Brothers

Okay. So my last few posts have been of a pretty serious nature. And I’ve been wanting to write something a little more light hearted for a while now. Just not sure what. Then this happened. And I figured I just had to share it. But before I do, let me give you some background. I have an older brother, and a younger sister. Yes, I’m the middle kid. And no, I didn’t get away with ANYTHING when I was younger. But when I think back to when we were all kids, I remember very little of the fights and arguments we all had. Mostly, I remember the fact that it was usually two of us against one of the others. And if it wasn’t that, then we were all getting along, and probably getting into trouble. All of which was, you guessed it, my fault. 😛

As the years have passed, we have all gone our separate ways. Started our own families. And thanks to technology and social media, never to far away from each other. My sister and I will talk periodically. Whether it be through text, Facebook, or on the phone. We always laugh during our conversations (although I sometimes have to remind her that she’s supposed to be laughing and not taking me seriously). We talk about life, the kids, the fact that miles prevent us from spending more time together in person and how much we don’t like that. We talk about the weather. How great her husband is. Whether or not I have a new love interest in my life. You know. All the important stuff. And when we do get to spend time together in person, it’s like we live next door to each other. My sister is awesome. And I love her dearly.
Then there’s my brother. I would classify our conversations as potpourri. They typically will start out going in one direction, and before you know it, we’ve made three u-turns, twelve wrong turns, j-walked in front of cops after getting two flat tires. Probably spending the night in jail because of said j-walking, inevitably with a 300 lb biker dude named bubba, who has less than reputably intentions. Only to be bailed out by our sister, who then lectured us because she had to sell her kids toys so that she could have gas money to drive 3 states over where she put up her life savings as bail, knowing full well she probably wouldn’t get it back, because as soon as Mom & Dad found out, they’d kill us and we would never make our court appearance. All of which started because one of us wanted coffee, and the other one didn’t feel like fixing a pot. Yeah. That’s pretty much how we are. And then once in a while, one of us will send a random text. And what follows, becomes a conglomeration of nonsense that could only happen between him and I. Take for example……the following:
On this occasion, I started it with a picture that I found. It read:
“I hate math tests. Because all through the chapter, it’s like really easy. And then you think you’ve got it. And then the test is like: IF I THROW A TRIANGLE OUT OF THE CAR AND THE CAR IS GOING 20KM/H, AND WIND RESISTANCE IS A THING THAT EXISTS, HOW MANY CUPCAKES CAN PEDRO BUY WITH ONE HUMAN SOUL?”. 
Chris: Seriously dude? The answer is quite elementary. The answer is phish, because purple.
Stephen: Nah. You’re forgetting about the wind resistance. Because of that, you have to multiply by the square root of pancake. Then divide that by green. Then add the phish, which gives you corn field. 
Chris: Indeed! But you’re also forgetting the effect of said wind resistance on the car. Thus you must divide the square root of pancake by blueberry squares to account for the vortices’s created by the open window. Once you’ve accounted for this, then you have to multiply “turn your head and cough by Dr. Jellyfingers” to the third power. Only then can you divide by green and finish the equation.
Stephen: Wait! Turn you head and cough by Dr Jellyfingers? You would need strawberry circles to get that. Which means you would have to divide hot dog by jellybean. Then multiply that by marshmallow.
Chris: But you’re forgetting to compensate for the Heisenberg Theorem, wherein strawberry circles are bypassed by using blueberry squares to punch through the space/time continuum. Unless you’ve gotten hold of a Heisenberg compensator, you must multiply turn your head and cough by Dr. Jellyfingers. Only then can we find out the cupcake to human soul ratio.
Stephen: Dude!! You can’t punch through the space time continuum without accounting for the black hole effect. And a Heisenberg Compensator won’t do anything for that. 
Chris: Unless the Heisenberg Compensator is powered by a flux capacitor!! Then you have the power to warp the black hole into a zero point singularity which will easily punch through the space/time continuum.
Stephen: That only works if the flux capacitor is powered with an Omega Particle. Which means you then have to multiply blueberry pancake by rose petal. And then divide that by the square root of peanut butter.
It ended there. And as you can tell, he has a much better imagination than I do (and I think I was hungry). But I’ve read this exchange several times since then. And I’m reminded of the unique relationship that my brother and I have. And how even though we don’t talk all the time, we can still have fun together, and bring continued joy to each others life. My brother and I share many commonalities. We’ve both been through some pretty traumatic events. And I think that’s partly why we have become as close as we are. And why we can be silly, and still feel like adults, sort of. My brother is awesome. And I love him dearly.
So what’s my point? Who cares? I’m not even sure there is one. But I will leave you with this. Life is a gift. Siblings make that gift even better. Don’t take it for granted. And don’t be afraid to be silly every once in a while. Trust me. It does a body good. 🙂   PEACE!!!!

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